btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
