and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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