when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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