Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
