Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You dont lie about slip and slides
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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