Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
