In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
