They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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