How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
