whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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