who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
