Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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