There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
