I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
