All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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