The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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