I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
