We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
