That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
So squirting runs in the family.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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