do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
