We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize