why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
