seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize
