I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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