Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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