all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
