pedialite and red bull = repair kit
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
