yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
