why im i the only drunk person in the library?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
It's shark week go big or go home
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
