she was so not down for the gang bang
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
i out mim tonsoeep
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