dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
