Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
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