You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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