They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
then he tried to convert me to islam
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
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