We won't sleep together?
look no pants
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
