She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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