Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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