nut hugger
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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