I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
