If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
