If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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