absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i dont even know how to be here
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
