i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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