So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
