just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
