Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
