He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
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