Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
