Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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