Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize