At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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