I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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