Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
