You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Randomize
