sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
